day five

120 hours without smoking.. five days.. around 50 cigarettes (2 1/2 packs) I haven't put through my body.

Today has been slightly better than yesterday. I'm a bit more in control of my emotions than I have been the previous three days. I'm still more emotional and irritable than I like, and my outbursts have been fewer. I think I'm in the thick of the quit right now, so as long as I can make it without any casualties the next week or so, everything just might be okay.. ;)

Things that have helped:

• Walking.. being outside in general.
• Music.. especially in the car, turning it up loud and singing has helped so incredibly much.
• Tea and toast.. in the mornings. I'm now eating breakfast instead of smoking with coffee!
• Crying. As much as I've hated it, I'm much happier crying than running to a cigarette.

Speaking of, I'm curious to how much a crutch cigarettes have been to me over the past four years. I wonder if I used it so much that now actually dealing with things is a little overwhelming. I also know that my body is out of whack, and I definitely won't be losing it every time I think someone gives me the stink eye forever.

As much as I hate feeling like this, I really haven't "craved" a cigarette. There have been many occassions where it felt natural to go have one, but after a split second I always remember "I don't do that any more" and find something else to do. Maybe twice have I considered smoking.. and that's lasted about 2-3 minutes each.

I noticed while I ate dinner I could taste everything and it was fantastic.

Thanks to everyone who's been reading this all week and have been giving me support. Every single "you can do it!" and "I'm proud of you." helps more than you know.

Off to the beach this weekend! My first vacation smoke freeeeeeeee...